Friday, May 23, 2014

“Thomas be all doubtin’ til he sees that Jesus has holes in his hands!”

When I came to Macedonia in May 2013, I bonded with a ten year old girl named Jagoda, who had just arrived at The 25th of May (the orphanage where we volunteer) a few weeks prior. She was shy, withdrawn, and it took me a couple of days to break the ice with her, but when I finally did, we were inseparable. We both cried our eyes out when I left, and I promised her that I would come back again next year.

It turns out that last July, Jagoda was moved to a different orphanage in Macedonia due to a logistical mistake in her original placement. Selfishly, I was disappointed when I learned about her transfer several months ago, but I was also extremely happy when I learned that she was moved to a much nicer facility. Thankfully, former Georgia girl Elizabeth Burton is now a full time Macedonian and was able to pull some strings to get me a couple of hours with Jagoda today.

The first twenty minutes or so of our reunion was lackluster. I guess I expected her to run straight to me and hug and kiss me and say “Te Cakam” (I love you) over and over again just like last year. Well, that was hardly the case. Although she said she remembered me, shy little Jagoda was back. We awkwardly talked with the help of Jagoda’s social worker for a few minutes, but I felt no connection between us. I forced a smile and continued to ask her questions although my heart was breaking on the inside. I came back to Macedonia because I made a promise to this little girl and now this? I felt so disappointed and seriously started to doubt why I came on this trip again. The social worker suggested Jagoda show me her bedroom, so we went upstairs. She showed me her bag with colored pencils and paper, and I asked if she wanted to color. We went back downstairs, and the fun began. As soon as we started coloring, it was as if we hadn’t missed a beat. We laughed, took pictures, played outside, giggled, acted silly, and just had the best time. My heart was overflowing.

When it came time to leave, Elizabeth explained to Jagoda that the two of them could visit each other and keep in touch and that Jagoda and I could send messages, gifts, etc. to each other through Elizabeth. Because of this, our departure was nothing like the crying mess of last year. Instead it was joyful and happy because we know we can be in touch now. I do not know if I’ll have the chance to see Jagoda again on this trip (and I didn’t make that promise to her), but my heart is full knowing that she is so happy, is in a much better place, and that I will be able to keep in touch with her now.

Without going into too much detail, I found out that during my time with Jagoda, Elizabeth was able to have an in-depth conversation with the social worker, Irena, as well. Elizabeth has a vision for how she wants to help the orphans at the 25th of May, and Irena is a great connection to have. Coincidence? I think not. Looking back, I had doubts about whether or not I would even get to see Jagoda on this trip, and then I had doubts as to if it was a mistake even meeting up with her. Silly me. Romans 8:28 says “And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to His purpose.” This verse rings true on so many levels now. God has a plan for the kids of Macedonia, and He made it clear today by using a chain of events that started last year with Jagoda and me to a new connection between Elizabeth and Irena. God also has a plan for me, and He made it clear today that I need to stop doubting Him and instead put my trust in Him. Proverbs 3:5 says “Trust in the Lord with all of your heart and lean not into your own understanding.” Today absolutely affirms that I need to trust God’s will, power, and love over anything else. He has a plan for me, for Jagoda, and for all the children at the 25th of May, and I can’t wait for it to unfold.



Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see. Hebrews 11:1












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